Le-go my eggs-o

Still no smiley face. And it's day 20, so who knows, but
a) my face is mostly pimple-free
b) there's less stretchy mucus
c) and no pelvic achy-ness

So... clear skin, no discharge, and no belly pain? And that's disappointing? I know, crazy! I called Dr. S's office today and talked to my favorite nurse, Lisa. She's the sweetest of the bunch and we spent 5 whole minutes (which is a long time for a check-in!) chatting about the situation. She was surprised, but says I should keep testing through the end of the week. Apparently after-day-20 eggs are ok eggs, so I must have misunderstood Dr. S at our first appointment. She offered me an ultrasound, but I didn't really feel like doing it. It doesn't really matter if the Clomid didn't work this month because we're changing drugs next month anyways, and it's not like you can do anything about it if there are no eggs.  Lack of smiling pee sticks does seem to make the two week wait less angst-ridden. But... bummer.

My world isn't falling apart over the absence of eggs. I'm a little bummed, a little somber, but not beside myself. Church really helped this week. {I'm about to get all religious on you... fair warning} The gospel reading this week was this:

Luke 5:4-11
4And when He had finished speaking, He said to Simon, "Put out into the deep and let down your nets for a catch." 5And Simon answered, "Master, we toiled all night and took nothing! But at your word I will let down the nets." 6And when they had done this, they enclosed a large number of fish, and their nets were breaking. 7They signaled to their partners in the other boat to come and help them. And they came and filled both the boats, so that they began to sink. 8But when Simon Peter saw it, he fell down at Jesus’ knees, saying, "Depart from me, for I am a sinful man, O Lord." 9For he and all who were with him were astonished at the catch of fish that they had taken, 10and so also were James and John, sons of Zebedee, who were partners with Simon. And Jesus said to Simon, "Do not be afraid; from now on you will be catching men." 11And when they had brought their boats to land, they left everything and followed Him.

I scooted a little closer to Rob for the reading. During the homily, the priest joked that Simon Peter didn't say, "Look, Jesus, I'm a fisherman. I've been doing this for a long time. I know what I'm doing..." even though he could have. I could kind of see where Simon Peter was coming from. We've been doing this for a long time. We know what we're doing. But we haven't caught any fish.

Rob told a very frustrated Sarah this morning, "Just because you don't see any fish doesn't mean there aren't fish there!" Sarah snarkily replied, "My fish come with smiley-faces and there are no smiley-faces!" But he's right. Maybe all hell broke loose and my ovaries did their thing a week ago? Maybe Femara is the right baby-making drug for us? Who knows.

We both feel called to be parents and every time I ask God if we should really continue trying this nonsense, I feel a resounding "YES!" Maybe I'm crazy. Maybe my neurons are making answers up. But I'm trying to trust that there is a plan. A good one.

And now Rob just told me that he's had the phrase "Space-Doodie" (from a Friends episode) stuck in his head all day.





Interesting.
...and life goes on... with or without those stupid eggs. ;)